There's been a bunch of talk on LiveWire about gay bullying. Bi, homosexual, and lesbian users have posted things about their experiences. Some of the stories are very sad. As a straight women, could I post something in reply? What about an eating disorders support group? A cancer group? It's all a question about where to draw the line. Some different views I've thought of:
Post only what you know
Not knowing something could lead to trouble. What if you were to give the wrong advice for a person? Sure they are actively seeking information from others on the web, but this person you are responding to could be vulnerable. There are some emotions pulsating through them that may cause them to respond in a hurried or emotion-driven way and they make take your advice at face value.Post what you are comfortable doing so
On these websites you are not required to reply to others. You don't have to write back on every topic because the sites are used enough that if you don't respond someone else will.Post what is responsible
Being responsible to the community is one of the most important parts of these websites. You are expected to play by the rules of the site otherwise you will get kicked off.
Post what is human
You don't have to be an expert to reply to another human being. Knowing everything about a particular person's concern (being close to them) may help you a little bit. Certainly having experienced a health or emotional issue helps to know what to say, but it doesn't have to be this way. Giving advice doesn't rely solely on your past or present.
I'm not choosing a side on this issue. Right now I'm just exploring these possibilities in the communities and adhering by the ethical rules, written or unwritten, of the sites. No matter what you do, there are people who are glad to have this resource open to them. The risks are there, but users tend to find rewards in what is written as is true from this post on supportgroups.com:
You make a really interesting point.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. I think that the internet may lead unqualified people to reply to others.
What also makes me frustrated about the system is that someone who is ignorant about the feelings of others can reply and damage the user or "post-er" emotionally.
It would be unfair for an anti-gay activist to reply to a videoblog of an emotionally crippled newly-out kid, only adding to his bullying. However, it happens and there is no way to monitor their words and the platforms they use to express their views.
Hi Beth, this is great.
ReplyDeleteI particularly appreciate the "post what is responsible" and "post what is human" elements. Too often the anonymity of the web provides ill-willed individuals the chance to compose offensive, vulgar posts. This can be especially damaging in situations similar to what Michael described - i.e. anti-gay activists replying to newly-out kids, anti-abortionists berating pro-choice women, chauvinistic men bullying women with weight issues, etc.
As long as people stick to what is responsible, human and what they know... I think advice from the unqualified can be an important and helpful presence on supportgroups.com